What I Found in My Beard This Morning
It must be spring coming on. I couldn’t stand my beard for another minute. I had warned my wife that it had to go. She finally gave in and said that if the beard was bothering me so much I could shave it off.
As spring approaches my beard gets shaggier and itchier. It drives me nuts. I get tired of it getting into my bowl of Cheerios® and my oil paints.
So this morning I shaved it off and my wife finished the job, cutting my hair after I mowed most of it off. It was while I was picking up the hair, which looked like a bale of cotton, that I found some of my stuff. I squeezed that bail of beard hair and got about a pint of syrup. I felt something sharp.
I was fishing last summer and dropped my flies. I looked all over the ground, pushing away the brush, and shooing away a rattlesnake, but I couldn’t find them. I thought it was Xrytspet© from Fanton in G10009845788899990766 playing tricks on me. That little wimp appeared and said she didn’t do it and even helped me look for them. Well, I found them this morning in my beard. There was an Adam’s Fly, two Royal Coachman, and that black gnat I tied on a number 18 hook I was so proud of.
One thing that has concerned me over the winter is that I lost my silver clad hematite bolo that my Navaho friend had made for me in Arizona. He gave me a discount only charging me 350 bucks. So I needed to find it. I saw the leather necklace first and when I pulled on it and there was the rest of the bolo. I jumped up and down with joy.
After I found the treasures, my wife sent me out to the front yard to put up the flag. The wind hit my face like ten thousand icicles.
Did I shave my beard too early this year?
The End
John T. Jones, Ph.D. (tjbooks@hotmail.com, a retired VP of R&D for Lenox China, is author of detective & western novels, nonfiction (business, scientific, engineering, humor), poetry, etc. Former editor of Ceramic Industry Magazine. He is Executive Representative of IWS sellers of Tyler Hicks wealth-success books and kits. He also sells TopFlight flagpoles. He calls himself "Taylor Jones, the hack writer."
More info: http://www.tjbooks.com
Business web site: http://www.aaaflagpoles.com
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